Here Is my Anxiety Disorder Story

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Welcome to TheWorryGames.com!  Thanks for reading my anxiety disorder story.

My name is AnnaLisa Scott , and I am a 44-year-old mom of 5 living in the midwest.

Anxiety Disorder Story

My anxiety disorder first erupted when I was about 25,  after my husband had a heart attack at the age of 35.   Two days after his heart attack,   I was driving home from the hospital and I had my first panic attack.

It was my FIRST panic attack,   and by far the WORST panic attack of my life.

None other since then has even come close to topping that one.

And the moment that panic attack began,  so began the worst period of my life.   General Anxiety Disorder and Panic Disorder pretty much took over my life.   It was a time filled with anxiety,  terror,  uncertainty,  confusion,  and exhaustion.   It continued off and on for the next 2-3 years with new symptoms popping up every time I would get the previous symptoms under control until eventually I got to the root of the issue and the symptoms gradually disappeared for the most part.

After I got my GAD and Panic Disorder under control,  I then developed a severe case of OCD which still affects my day-to-day life.    My symptoms  center around  “checking”  things and the safety of my kids.   Looking back over my life,  I think I have always had OCD issues,  but after I lost twin boys when I was three months pregnant in 2009,   my symptoms really kicked into high gear.    I have managed to get bring it down from severe to mild though and while I still have some minor issues with it,  my life no longer revolves around it to the degree that it once did.

I have had pretty much every anxiety symptom there is:

Health fears, intrusive thoughts,  panic attacks,  insomnia,  social anxiety,  palpitations,  fear of driving,  fear of leaving my house,  fear of the death of my loved ones,  depersonalization,  fear of going crazy,   fear of hurting myself or somebody I love,  obsessive checking, etc., etc.

I have had anxiety about having anxiety.  I have had anxiety about the times when I did NOT feel anxiety.   I have had fears of choking.   I have had fears of forgetting how to breathe.   I have had days where I was so filled with worry that I was literally sick to my stomach.   I have had pregnancy related anxiety.   I have had post partum anxiety so bad that I have been unable to sleep for days at a time out of fear my baby would die of SIDS.

I have been there,  done that with all of it….. and there was a time when I would have been horrified at the thought of telling the world about my problems.   It was a “secret” for years….but those days are long over.   I know who I am and I and no longer care about people’s perception of me.    I am a proud, card-carrying,  lifetime member of the “Anxiety Club”,   and I feel super lucky for that and I would gladly slap my face on a million posters if I thought my story and experience would help people recover.

Anxiety will always be a part of my life,  but it no longer controls me because I know it like the back of my hand.   I have figured it out.  I know what it is,  why it’s there and what my current anxiety level means about the state of my life at that time.

Anxiety is my guide……I NEED it in my life and if I had the choice to have it taken away forever,   I wouldn’t do it.  

I have learned that it is a good thing…a product of my own personality….and that instead of fighting it,  I need to LISTEN TO IT and figure out what it is really trying to tell me.

I have learned to control it,   I have learned how to live with it,  and there is absolutely not one single thing that anybody could tell me about their anxiety symptoms that I would find shocking or surprising.



Helping people with their anxiety disorder is my passion.   I think I “get” anxiety in a way that a lot of people don’t and I feel so lucky for that and I want to use that understanding to help improve people’s lives.

It is my mission in life to bust the “anxiety myth” and show the world that anxiety is not an illness.

I don’t even really like the word “disorder”  although I use that word for lack of a better one.   But it is a thinking disorder at best….not a mental illness.   Chronic anxiety,  in most cases,  is just untreated stress that is exacerbated by a person’s own personality traits and tendency to easily form habits.

It is,  in most cases,  very manageable and very easily understood if it is explained in the right way.    And I hope that is what I can do for you….explain anxiety in a way that helps you finally understand why it is there in the first place.

Once you understand that….its all downhill from there.

My life has not been easy.   But “easy” doesn’t build character and “easy” doesn’t build strength and if people can know only one thing about me,  I want them to know that I have used every horrible thing that has happened to me in my life to make myself a stronger,  better person.   It is a wonderful feeling to look back over my life and not be able to think of one negative event that has not taught me something valuable.

Anxiety didn’t ruin my life….it only made it better.    And I want to show you how to make it work for you, as well.  I want you to be a PROUD person with anxiety and embrace your uniqueness and “quirks” just as I do.  It takes some pretty special personality traits to create an anxiety disorder and you were lucky enough to be born with a lot of them and that is something to celebrate!

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There are no great secrets to anxiety recovery.  Its all about just stepping back and looking at it from a different angle.      I am a woman who wanted recovery more than anything else in this entire world,  and I knew that the only way to make that happen was to turn what was the worst thing that ever happened to me,  into something positive.   And that is what I did, and there isn’t one of you out there who can’t make the same choice.

Thanks again for letting me share my story with you.   If you would like to be inspired by some more stories of people living with a mental health diagnosis,  stop by Like-Minded Magazine;   lots of incredible,  strong people featured there.

Please use the links in the sidebar if you’d like to follow me on Twitter,  or visit my FB page.

Have a great day.

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Anxiety Disorder Story

 

 

Photo Credit:  Amy Davis, Everyday Inspiration Photography

 

Mantra

 

 

23 Comments

  1. I am a psychotherapist with the VA that suffers from GAD – go figure. Interesting site and some holistic useful tidbits. Thanks.

  2. Pingback: Chasing Happiness
  3. Almost done my anxiety journey. Your very good at explaining everything! I wish I found this blog 5 years ago. I’m so excited to share this with other people who suffer with anxiety. I hope when I say thank you, you can understand the depths from which it comes.

  4. I get daily headaches–some worse, some better, but daily. There’s no way I can feel sorry for myself when I read stories like yours. Kudos to you for getting through this!

  5. Thank you for sharing your story. I have had all your symptoms as well. It is disheartening to still be symptomatic after many years (where the anxiety has waxed and waned, currently waxing!) How do you do it?? I will read the rest of the blog but the physiologic components can be so challenging. Thank you again. You should become a counselor!!

    1. I too struggled with the physiological part of anxiety, I started going to a naturalpathic doctor and found it helped immensely

  6. Hi Lisa, I am excited to have found you. I am so interested in the things you have to share about anxiety and getting to know you! Thank you for being brave to share your story and your experiences so openly. Hopefully it will help others who are still trying to understand what is happening and or need some hope.

  7. Such an authentic and just straight from the gut post. Your honesty is inspirational and I mean this from the bottom of my heart…you make me want to be open and real about my issues. Thank you for showing me that there is another way to live with this stuff. Out in the open instead of hiding it from the world. (and of course I was never very good at the hiding part and that only made the whole thing a million times harder.) 😛
    I’m so glad that in this great big cyber world I stumbled on to your little piece of it.

  8. I think it’s great that you are talking about your anxiety disorder. I can’t imagine what it would be like but I do have depression, which can be really hard to live with. I don’t think these things are anything to be ashamed of or hide.

  9. What an inspirational story. It only takes one panic attack to strip away our natural protection from anxiety. Well done for turning your anxiety into a postivite and living your life.

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